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Post by Randy on Oct 2, 2017 0:51:28 GMT
So Ive never actually vented before and I figured atm this is the safest place to do so.. 1. Moved into new house in June. 2. Found out we are prego. 3. House full of kids...4 to be exact. 4. A month ago we find out its a Girl! She is my first girl. 5. 9yr old tells grandma we are prego. 6. G'ma flies off the handle and disowns all of us. 7. Been using new herbs to fight Bart & Myco and "ALS" symptoms are going nuts. Yes I detox daily 3 diff ways. May need more or new prote. 8. Started losing weight again after holding steady for months. Bart tells me to cry and get stabby all at the same time along with crawling into a f'n corner and waiting for death. All this is like pissing gas on a forest fire. The stress is brutal and I am unable to run away. All the success stories or stories about people who are in the same boat is not helping gggrrr!
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 2, 2017 1:53:03 GMT
How about an OMG! I'm so sorry!" post? As a mom and grandma myself, I'm really at a loss as to why any grandma would be upset over their first granddaughter from that child of theirs.
And the stress that you must be under? I can certainly sympathize with you on that. Please do your best to find a quiet few moments just for you each opportunity you get and remember to take a breath every once in a while.
I'm very glad that you felt like this was a safe place to vent. I hope you continue to use this place, or another, as long as you have a need to vent. This would be tough under "normal" circumstances. Know that you, and your family will remain in my thoughts.
If you would like to talk about your detox protocol, do let us know.
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Post by Randy on Oct 2, 2017 2:47:50 GMT
Thank you. Shes pissed because I have a few kids 2 I dont see because their moms moved out of state, but the other 2 I helped raise or raised myself alone. And because I have "ALS" and I'll be dyeing sooner rather than later. Its selfish she says. Also If I do have lyme and i can give it to the kiddo thats selfish also, as she would put it.
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 2, 2017 12:51:33 GMT
Well, I'm so very sorry!! I was just wondering yesterday others was "something in the air", as there are several people I'm in contact with going through tough times with family members....me included!! I don't understand why people have such a hard time understanding that although we are I'll, we have no desire to live in a cave. We have a life that we want to try to continue. And for you, this should be a time of celebration, whether the pregnancy was planned or not!!! I do hope your wife (assumption made, sorry) is standing strong by your side. I hope grandma comes around soon, or at least when she sees that baby granddaughter's beautiful face, once she's born. Sometimes we have to just go in living our lives and hope our family and friends can get over themselves and rejoin us with our lives soon. I hope the new house is a better situation for your growing family too!!!
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Post by michele on Oct 2, 2017 16:40:53 GMT
I'm sorry you are going through this.
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Post by Randy on Oct 2, 2017 18:44:45 GMT
G'ma doesnt want to ever see the baby and after how she treated Sarah its likely she never will. Sarah is standing tough with me. She is all could need and want from a woman. The new house is F'n awesome. The old apt was saturated with mold in the walls so the move was a requirement not so much a want.
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 2, 2017 19:17:00 GMT
Yes, a good partner to stand by your side, no matter what, is invaluable! I'm one of the lucky ones as well, with a spouse that has done nothing but encourage me, and support me through the last nearly 18 years of marriage and illness. We've had our tough times - a spouse with these diseases is hard to live with day in and day out, especially wh. en the spouse that is not ill gets scared - but the good that comes from having a wonderful spouse really can not be compared to. I'm so very glad you have such a wonderful Lady to stand by your side.
And, it will be harder on Grandma to not see your daughter than it will be on anyone else. It's such a shame when things like this happens - obviously, grandma hasn't thought of how her brothers might feel about grandma not seeing their sister. It could be her own 'undoing' as far as being a Grandma to those boys.
And, YAY on the house!!! I hope it gives your growing family lots of room!! Even if it wasn't a desire necessarily, I hope it turns out to be a great thing for your family - and safe for you all!!!
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Post by Randy on Oct 3, 2017 2:59:42 GMT
Thank u!
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Post by Randy on Oct 3, 2017 3:07:39 GMT
Detox: AM Burdock Root- 7 drops Danelion Leaf & Root- 11 drops Milk Thistle- 11 drops Several Glasses of water
PM: IR Sauna- 40 total min/27-30 actual sweating min/23oz of mineral water while in sauna. Dry brush prior. Epsom & Peroxide Foot Soak-1hr 3.7 gal of water/16oz of peroxide/1 1/2 cups epsom salt. Dry brush feet prior.
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 3, 2017 14:34:47 GMT
So you are only using the dandelion, burdock, and milk thistle in the am? Do you feel like you body could handle a slow start to add those things into your evening routine as well?
Because you are already using them and so you already know your body tolerates them, this would be an easy way to increase your detoxing.
But, I would still encourage you to start off low and slow to carefully find out just how much more you might need in the evenings. You may only need a portion of those sized doses.
By the way, I'm impressed you know down to them I ute how long you sweat in the sauna! Lol! I'm not sure I'd think to time that!
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Post by DJ on Oct 3, 2017 17:59:33 GMT
www.myemoticons.com/emoticons/images/msn/new-emoticons/hug.gif hope they came out, just in case they don't BIG HUGS! I just don't understand people, esp relatives! My whole family is a bit nutty when it comes to my lyme! Lyme disease is my excuse not to do things! ha ha I feel this way, don't need your stress n bs, I want to get better n I made up my mind that all stress must go. No matter who it is or was! I use to let them stress me out bad! Than I thought this is making me sicker, see ya stress! So glad you are in your new home! I bet u get lost in it! I bet the kids don't know what to do with all the room to run around in and drive u and your wife nuts! WOW! first girl, o boy is she going to be spoiled! Little girls are daddy's angels! O gosh I bet your wife is loving it too, gets to decorate for a little girl and not a boy! Congrads on your new home and your new little angel coming! Keep your chin up, it's hard at times, but it makes u the better person!
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Post by Randy on Oct 3, 2017 20:04:46 GMT
Lol yeah OCD is part of my Bart issues. Im a serious routine kinda person. I have thought about adding more drops in the am or doing a couple in the evening but not sure yet. My biggest issue is doing to much in the evening to cause loss of sleep like I went through in March,April & May. That was f'n hell! I figure if I do stuff during the day I have the whole day to get any reactions under control before bedtime.
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Post by DJ on Oct 4, 2017 12:48:35 GMT
I am a bit OCD too, thanks to bart issues also! It took me a while to get my stress and stupid people under control! Esp when I lost my gf of 30 yrs, but o well, I finally am thinking of myself instead of others! Now when it comes to the work around the house and things like that, O BOY! I have to have order LOL yes its stressful, lol Ask traveler, always cleaning lol. But now I am feeling better and somewhat have my health in order, I go to our local shelter and volunteer, makes me feel good to help the animals. And the animals love the visits.
My husband is happy about it too, gets me out of his hair and he see's it makes my anxiety and depression so much better. I use to go into a panic attack when I had to drive somewhere, now it's gotten better. I still have fits and want to run stupid people over, but I know that's not a good thing to do lol.
I still have moments, which I know won't be going anywhere soon, but I am just thankful I have gotten this far with this disease, took 13 yrs of hell! I have had LD for 14 yrs now.
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 4, 2017 17:17:57 GMT
So, Randy, how are you handling the detoxing that you do in the am then? Still struggling some? If so, I agree on holding off, but if you seem to be pretty stable on that, then you can add in more/different things at other times to help your body detox just a bit better. DJ - I think it's safe to say that if someone puts critters as a motivator for either of us, we would do a lot more! LOL! You are as goofy as I am, at least!
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Post by Randy on Oct 5, 2017 3:03:26 GMT
Ohh the detoxing herbs have never made me feel anything actually. Its how I know killin herbs vs detoxing. I think the detox herbs have pushed dead bacteria out cuz the last 5mo ish my poop f'n stinks and never really used to.lol
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Post by deejavu on Oct 7, 2017 17:08:41 GMT
Hi Randy,
I'm so sorry you are going through this.. When I was sick with chronic lyme I had no support from my family whatsoever. I didn't have a diagnosis until 5 years after I was bit by either a tick or spider (the doctor that did a skin biopsy on me said it was a spider bite), don't know if that was true.
In any case I was left alone to fend for myself which was really hard. I did have 2 doggies at the time and they were my support system until I found a lyme forum. It took me a very long time to accept the fact that my family was not there for me. Also, I did have a husband who also didn't support me but yelled at me all the time so I kicked him out and later on we divorced. Glad I had no children.
There were many time I wanted to find ticks and put them in my families homes or beds so they would get bit!! It was only a thought!! LOL!
Hang in there and use this forum for support. I always said the people who "get it" are the ones who have lyme.
Denise
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Post by Randy on Oct 7, 2017 17:55:43 GMT
Thank you Denise! It gets worse. She is gunna try and take me to court to see my 9yr old son since I refuse to let her see him because of her actions,behavior and language towards me and my gf. What type of f'n mother acts this way? She is such a controlling jerk.
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Post by deejavu on Oct 7, 2017 21:51:44 GMT
Oh Randy,
From what I know I don't think your Mom can take you to court to see your 9 year old son. But I'm not an attorney and the laws vary in each state.
I recommend you sign up with:
www.avvo.com and ask an attorney.
I also found this (I don't know how to put in a link, you can copy it and paste it in a new browser):
www.grandparents.com/family-and-relationships/grandparents-rights/dograndparentshavetherightstheyshould
At the most basic level, all states require grandparents to prove that the visits they seek are in the best interest of the grandchild. This generally means grandparents must show that their visits won’t be harmful in any way, and that they aren’t abusive or otherwise dangerous to the child. Beyond this initial hurdle, each state has a different threshold for when it will allow grandparents to take a case to court.
Some states are more permissive when it comes to filing for visitation. Connecticut, Hawaii, Idaho, Kentucky, Maryland and New York require only the ground rule mentioned above — that visitation is in the best interest of the child — before grandparents can take a case to court.
Other states set more stringent requirements allowing grandparents to file a suit only if they were denied visitation altogether. Under current laws in Alabama, Florida, Iowa, Mississippi, Oregon, Rhode Island and Utah, grandparents don't have a case if parents permit them to see their grandchildren — no matter how infrequently.
In Minnesota and Pennsylvania, grandparents cannot make a legal case unless their grandchildren previously lived with them. Outside the U.S., grandparents may be surprised to learn how limited their rights are.
Burden of Proof
The most restrictive states, such as Florida, Minnesota and Pennsylvania, require proof that grandparents have a parent-child relationship with their grandchild, meaning they have often stood in for the child’s parents.
Depending on the state, these requirements can be as extreme. Grandparents may have to show they took care of the child full-time while parents were gone for extended periods of time or that they participated in typical parental duties — taking the child to doctor appointments or attending PTA meetings.
It's difficult to document a pre-established relationship with a grandchild, says Marsha Temlock, MA, the psychologist who wrote Your Child’s Divorce: What to Expect — What You Can Do (Impact Publishers, 2006). "You've got to get people to sign affidavits that document you've visited the children a certain number of times, or you may have to bring the children into the courtroom," she says.
Hang in there Randy! Denise
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Post by DJ on Oct 8, 2017 13:54:23 GMT
So, Randy, how are you handling the detoxing that you do in the am then? Still struggling some? If so, I agree on holding off, but if you seem to be pretty stable on that, then you can add in more/different things at other times to help your body detox just a bit better. DJ - I think it's safe to say that if someone puts critters as a motivator for either of us, we would do a lot more! LOL! You are as goofy as I am, when it comes to animals! lol
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Post by Admin/ Traveler on Oct 8, 2017 16:09:34 GMT
Hi Randy, Boy, some people never seem to know when to quit, do they?
I don't often speak of this, because it's usually not related to Lyme for most people. My mom did something very similar to me. She made my life extremely difficult, and I did not put up with the gender bias that she had towards her children and grandchildren. So when I moved out (to get married), she decided that we were being abusive to the kids because we lived differently and she was not allowed a lot of contact(because of the way she spoke to and treated my kids)....so she kidnapped my kids and put them on a plane to their biological dad. He was not a good person, and of course, I wanted my kids back - so I took her and my ex to court. I did win, got full custody - but my point is that even if they can't do things legally, they can make life a living h*ll for the parents, so do be careful. It took about 5-6 months to get my kids back and I had to sit in court and listen to all the things that their wild imagination came up with on all the ways I was abusing my own kids. I had to endure several 'home inspections' from child protection services too - and they said the exact same thing the judge did - while not how they would choose to live, the kids were healthy and well cared for. My Mom and Ex didn't have a leg to stand on, but they still managed to really hurt me and my kids.
Protect yourself -record every account that you, your wife and kids can think of about negative issues with her visiting the kids, the issues and stress she has already caused and anything else you can think of. Just because she may not have a legal leg to stand on, she can still get you into court first -and that causes a ton of stress.
Start now and search out a good lawyer - that way if you do wind up in court, you already have the lawyer chosen and it's not a last minute pressure to find one - or settle for what you can get on short notice.
This is about protecting you and your family, not about attacking grandma, so do be careful to not let people know about this that also know grandma, as you don't word to get back to her and have that spur her on either.
Again, I'm so very sorry. I do wish you the very best of luck with this and hope that grandma is just spouting off at this point.
By the way - my kids really want nothing to do with my Ex, his family, or my mom from that point on. That was 25 years ago and they have told me those people will never be in their lives, even though I was very careful about how I talked about those people within earshot of my kids, and honestly and openly talked to them about whatever details they wished to know. I was really quite worried that I had 'set this up' to happen, but they assured me that they had reached their decision despite my efforts.
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